The Visor

Security officer tells all in exclusive interview

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April 22, 2010

Peter DelMedico

You encounter him every day upon entering Hoban, but do you really know Adam Whitesmith? Do you really know the one? Behind the trench coat, sunglasses and embroidered badge there is a truly committed officer. Whitesmith was formerly a corporate pilot, but is currently Hoban’s very own security officer. He is the one who keeps trespassers off the Hoban grounds and instills proper parking. Affectionately known as Neo by many students, Adam’s efficiency in the parking lot ironically makes him one of a kind in the world of security officers.

Q. What do students do that annoys you most?/Biggest pet peeve of being a security officer

A. When I have to chase kids or parents around the parking lot.

Q. Who were your role models when you were young?

A. Outside of my uncle and my parents, definitely Michael J. Fox.

Q. Did you have to buy a parking pass?

A. No, I did not.

Q. How many agents have you killed?

A. At least four.

Q. Is Trinity your girlfriend?

A. No, my wife looks nothing like Trinity, but she is often mistaken for Helen Hunt.

Now that the truth of Neo is out, before you enter Hoban, remember: you also have to enter the Matrix.

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